| The
darkest night
When I was a child my parents lived in Kyaut Pyu Kee, a small village
in the area. Our village was far from the main village. When I was
old enough, my parents sent me to school and I studied up till third
grade. My parents earned their living by hillside rice cultivation
using the slash and burn method. They went and lived in the rice
fields and returned to the village to live with us when they finished
their work. In our village we also had a betel plant garden where
we lived.
When
I was thirteen my farther died of disease. As we only had women
in our family, my elder sister and I left school and worked with
my mother in rice cultivation. Every year we cultivated enough rice
for our family.
In
1996, at the time we were clearing a site for rice cultivation,
the Burmese Army ordered everyone to move out from our village.
They did not say where the villagers had to move to or live. They
only ordered us to move out from the village and live elsewhere.
Some villagers moved to other villages and others fled into the
jungle or up the river near to our village. Some people, they did
not know where to move to and continued to stay in our village.
For
our family, we did not know where to move to. If we went to the
main village we would not have any food and if we fled into the
jungle we also would not have any food. So, as with some other villagers
we remained in our village. After one month the Burmese soldiers
arrived at our village and burned down thirty houses including ours.
After that we fled to the tip of a stream in our area with other
villagers and lived there. In that hiding site we earned our living
with rice cultivation by slash and burn method. As there were only
women in our family, we did not have any man to take care of our
security. Whenever we had to go and find fish paste and salt in
the village my elder sister and I fearfully went with other people.
Sometimes only three of us, my mother, sister and I went to get
food.
In
1999,when I was seventeen I married a villager, who was also an
internally displaced person. After a year we had a daughter. We
lived with my mother and we moved from place to place and lived
in the jungle in constant fear. It was more difficult to get food
from the village because of the Burmese troops' frequent patrols.
For four years we moved and lived with many difficulties.
One
day, in November 2000, my husband went hunting at 4 p.m., while
our families were preparing dinner. During this time we heard gunfire
near our house. Many bullets hit our house and landed close to us.
We realized that the Burmese troops were firing at us and we ran
out from our house. Just after leaving the house I remembered that
my daughter was sleeping in the hammock inside and I rushed back
to the house and took my daughter. When I came down from the house
I saw my younger sister lying dead under the ladder, she had been
shot in the head. The Burmese troops were continuing to fire their
guns and some bullets landed close to me so I had to keep running
and could not care for my sister. After running for a while I heard
my daughter moaning and when I looked at her I saw that her leg
was bleeding. I realized that my daughter's leg was hit but as the
bullets were still coming very close to me, I had to keep on running.
When I had been running for a while, I was shot in my shoulder.
After some distance I could still hear the gunshots but as none
of the bullets were landing close to me, I stopped to rest. After
a while my mother arrived and when she saw my daughter was shot,
she took off her sarong and tied it round my daughter's wound. After
this, as we feared that the Burmese troops would capture us, I took
out my sarong and used it to carry my child. My mother and I continued
running without any clothes on the lower part of our body.
We
were running for the whole night in the jungle. Near dawn, we reached
a group of our villagers' hiding place and they shared with us some
clothes and food. But I could not take any food because I had seen
my sister dying from gunshot wound to her head, my daughter was
shot and bleeding and I myself was also shot and bleeding. My whole
body was covered in blood and I could not eat. I was worried that
the Burmese troops would find us and I was very sad about the death
of my younger sister, sorry for my daughter and also worried for
my husband. All of our family were crying the whole night. I did
not see my husband that night. I did not know when he would arrive.
The
next day he was looking for us and we met him. When we fled from
the Burmese troops gunfire, we could not carry anything. Our entire
household's property, paddies and rice were taken by Burmese soldiers
who burned our house to the ground. Nothing left with us, except
the clothes on our body. Other displaced people shared with us and
fed us with what they had left. Later we move to another place and
we met with Karen resistance fighters who looked after us and treated
our gunshot wound.
One
moth later my wound was healed. My daughter's wound did not heal
well and she could not walk. When my daughter was shot she was only
ten months old.
I remember
clearly in my mind what happened to me that time and the fear and
sadness are always in my heart. At present we have to live in hiding
at the tip of a stream, deep in the jungle, in fear and with many
difficulties. We are trying hard to get enough food for our families
but we never have enough. We do not know what will happen to us
and what we have to face in the future. In my life I never made
anybody hurt or sad, so I do not understand why I have to face this
kind of trouble. Sometimes these problems cause me to ask God, "Why
Lord? Why do you allow this to happen to us? Why Lord?"
From
CIDKP newsletter
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